This post was originally published here by one of the members of The Walk

The rain had paused long enough for her to run down the street. The sidewalk was painted by the faded orange street lamps, and we were just supposed to drive by, continue on, keep going.

Of course I couldn't. She was obviously crying, so I pull around the block and park. "I'm just going to see if she's alright," I say to my coworker in my passenger seat.

I hate wearing shoes. Even flip flops, I just want bare feet. I'm sure I should be concerned about glass or nails or something else that could harm me. But tonight, I'm just not.

I open my car door, bare feet onto the rain-soaked pavement and run towards her. She's half running, half distraught, but she turns and stops when I ask if she's alright.

I don't really mind that we're in the middle of the road, that we may be in someone's way. I don't mind, the girl just needed a quick reminder; nothing gets in the way of love.

And that's all it really takes. A little desperation for change – or love or freedom or hope – and showing up bare. But I am always wishing there was something else. Something more.
Her mascara is old. It hasn't run neatly down her face like fresh mascara would do. Instead, little black specs have taken over her now grey cheeks and she wipes it like it might all go away for me not to see.

We just hug. Loose gravel sticks between my toes and we don't let go. Two strangers in the street, covered in rain and faded orange light.

"Why do we keep doing this to ourselves? Why don't women see how much they're worth? I make him so much money, and he treats me like s***." She talks like we're friends, no, sisters. I can't help but wonder if we are.

We're still hugging. Her hairspray and a trail of liquor hit my nose and I've got nothing left to say.

People keep telling me prostitution is a choice.

Her feet are bare too. She says they're in her pimps car – the handsome man in the silver car nearby – and I want to get her my flip flops. I want to get her in my car, and give her my flip flops. Or maybe we could go eat pancakes at an all-night diner, or just sit there in the car. My mind is racing, but she just needed a hug in the middle of the night, without an expectation for something in return.

They keep telling me it's a choice, but I've yet to see it once.

After four years out on those streets, building relationships with these women I quickly call my friends, knowing the stats of entry are still sitting at 12-14 year of age, and I can't see the choice here. I can see the money, the hacking of heart and soul, but not the choice. Can you?

Of course she needs to keep going. She's got someone she needs to get away from. She says I'm the nicest person she's ever met and I can't help but think that's such an overstatement of my efforts, but I've felt the embrace of a real hug too.

My coworker and I, We sit and watch for a while in the car. She yells at her pimp, proclaiming her love and her hate in one breath at him. We listen, we cringe. We watch him leave, come back, leave and come back again.

And there at the little white church with the bright graffiti wall, she slouches into a ball. He comes back, kneels, puts on her shoes, and we watch.
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Her hair was wet, mascara old, shoes missing, tears falling, and they keep telling me to let them be, this is all their choice.

WHY DO MINISTRY IN PARLOURS IF THEY'RE LEGAL?
Although Massage Parlors are legal in Alberta, the sexual services that are offered in them really blur the lines between a real massage and a sexual favour. Many of the practices that happen in these particular massage parlours, mirror or lead into practices that are done in brothels. The purpose of this ministry is to bring light into these places as they too are apart of what makes up the core of sex trafficking.

​WHO GOES INTO THESE BUSINESSES?
Generally we see men of all walks of life entering these massage parlors, whether it be intentionally or unintentionally. Those who are oblivious to the nature of such businesses, are often shocked to be offered sexual favors during or near the end of the massage.  As for the women who work in these businesses, the majority of them are mothers trying to provide for their family. Many of the situations we come across are ladies from S.E. Asia, who have come to Calgary to work and send money back home. Many of them also don't hold Canadian citizenship or don't speak English well (if at all), which forces them to hide and work behind walls. Typically they can make more money quickly in the sex industry than they could at a regular day time job. This often leaves these women vulnerable to be exploited by sex traffickers. There are also many Canadian women that work in this industry, some are students trying to pay off debt, others are single mothers. 

DO YOU SEE ANY OPPOSITION?
There has only been one massage parlor which has openly discouraged us from coming back. Not because of anything we had done, but simply because of what Jesus is doing. His heart is to bring love and hope to these women and men and to ultimately see these businesses of exploitation shut down. When you walk in the love and light of Jesus, darkness has to flee! The enemy hates that, which is why we have seen push back or even tactics of intimidation from certain locations in the city. God won't stop pursuing their hearts, so neither will we.

ARE YOU EVER AFRAID?
I would be lying if I said there weren't moments of fear or anxiety. Having done this style of ministry both in other countries and now in my home city, I have learned a lot! You have got to put you entire hope and trust in Jesus; without him there is no favor, no purpose and no protection. There is always the risk of "what if" in anything in life you pursue. But if we are humble and obedient to the call of God, we can trust him to get us through the storms that may come. 

WHAT DO YOU ACCOMPLISH IN A NIGHT?
By the world standards, what we "accomplish"  in one night may not look like much. But in God's eyes we are taking back ground spiritually, then physically, through prayer and perseverance.  When we deliver gifts to the girls in the massage parlours, we are planting small seeds of hope. Our heart is to build friendships with them in the hopes of encouraging them to find other means of employment or support that does not exploit them. This process of building  trust is low and slow, due to the nature of how intently the girls are watched and controlled by the pimps or madams.
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WHAT HAVE YOU LEARNED SO FAR FROM THIS MINISTRY?
Some of the most profound things I have learned while doing this ministry are:

• that the need in our city regarding massage parlor/brothel ministry is HUGE... much bigger than I had anticipated
• to allow God to direct the pace and strategy of the ministry, as it's very unique and very intense in comparison to what we have seen on the streets
• warfare comes before a breakthrough, so don't give up
• Jesus is more than capable of capturing people's hearts, we just need to be available 

I have never been able to walk well in heels. While I love drooling over beautiful stems, I simply twist ankles and scare people when I try to walk. However, there on the third shelf from the bottom in that downtown Winners store gleamed a pair of Guess pumps I couldn't ignore. The print along the heels, all the strappy-goodness wrapping up the ankle, all the color, all the beauty: obviously I simply couldn't ignore them. Or maybe yes, I could. 

I was determined to begin saving money, and knew I'd be the wisest in moving away from those shoes. In fact, I'd be even smarter to get out of the store altogether. And so I paced quickly from that shoe section of that downtown Winners store.

And then I walked back. I tried them on, all five inches of glory holding my weight like a solid foundation. I couldn't help but to imagine these shoes would probably make my entire life better. Of course they wouldn't, but I'd determined it to be true. I paid for those shoes and walked out of the store half grinning, and half ashamed. They were shoes, I don't know why I'd made it such a big deal. 

It was a big deal. It turns out even the smallest of decisions can weigh heavily on our heart if we don't think long enough about what we're doing or are about to do. It's easy to determine to do anything, but brave people determine to do something specific instead.

I learned a couple things that day, and I hope they're helpful for you too:

>> Determination without reason is faulty: I can be determined about anything, but if it isn't specific, it won't last. Because I wanted to save money wasn't reason enough to keep me away from those heels. I would have done better to know what I was saving for. Having specific goals in mind like saving to go back to school, or saving for my own home would have been an easier target to keep in mind than simply saving.

>> Bad decisions don't help, they just try to haunt: Those shoes have sat in my closet for two years. They're only service to me is a reminder that I still can't walk in heels, nor am I so inclined. They're now the reminder of taking it slow when I need to make a decision too. I don't sit in regret over my purchase because I've learned to accept forgiveness from bad decisions, but every time I open my closet, I'm reminded of that day. 

See in life we're told to gain wisdom. I think it's important to realize we're told to gain it. It is something we have to learn, not something we're handed or simply not gifted with. Wisdom is hard work, and requires more than determination. We need to have determination in specific goals. Lastly, when we do make bad decisions, we have to understand we weren't made for these to haunt us either. There is freedom for us when we choose wisely, and we won't have scars from what we chose not to participate in. But! We can still move forward from our bad decisions too. Honestly I shake my head when I see those shoes, but somewhere along the way I hope to make what was a bad decision for me become a blessing for someone else (I hear that's what God is in the business of doing anyhow). 

Anyone a size six and a half?

With love,

D.